The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.

The chapter Psalm 23 in the Bible is pretty famous, but if we really think about the words they are POWERFUL.  The first verse is usually translated "The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want".  Other translations also clarify, saying "The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing"  or "... I have all that I need".  Can we believe so hard that God is going to take care of us that we also believe that we don't need to want anything more or lack anything?

I've been thinking lately.  The first two weeks after I moved out, I was totally in love with Jesus, just spending 3 times a day with him, once at every meal, praying and reading the Bible.  As school and responsibilities got more busy, I started skipping times with God and just rushing through life.  When I started rushing through life or just drifting with it ("going with the flow" rather than making time for God), I started to feel like I was lacking something.

A man.  Yeah.  That again.  I started wondering once again how come it didn't work out with Harold, or wanting the comfort of Christos back (he was just always there, talking with me every day, his words were like fake honey, like glucose fructose, and I say fake and not sugar because God's Word is supposed to be the real deal).

It all starts with desire.  If we desire God more than anything, we will be satisfied and feel like we don't need anything except God.  Let me tell you, that is a freeing feeling.  The first two weeks after I moved out I never felt so at peace and free.  I had fun serving at church and I had full confidence that everything was going to be ok.  Now?  I'm fluctuating.  I'm realizing I need to get back to desiring God first, instead of trying to make myself happy through my own methods.

When I am good with God, I am joyful, confident, and free.  I need to stay that way.  To do that, I need to say no to temporary pleasures that may make me end up in pain or trouble (e.g. Christos wants to see me alone... AGAIN!)  I can't let things like that happen, no matter how much it seems appealing in the short term.  I need to love God more.  I need to be lovesick for Jesus and no one else.