Another sleepless night?

Alright so I talked to Tommy over text today and yes it's over text because he doesn't want to hear from me... he needs space and instead I talked to his brother over the phone which really helped.   Right now Tommy needs to hear from God the most, not even his friends can help him.  But his friends greatly helped me.

I feel calm and at peace, just when I think too much or talk about it I will cry but I'm getting good at smiling in the storm.  With Christ in my vessel I can smile at the storm, Til he sails me home... (yes that is a song for kids)

I deleted Tommy off of facebook and this blog and I deleted his number too except I can memorize his number so what's the point.  At least he texted me today so I could spank some sense into him because today I realized certain things that I believe Tommy needs to understand.

I have faith right now that Tommy and I can get back together because of what his friend Nath said.  And also because yesterday I cried a lot and realized I don't love Harold right now, I love Tommy and I choose Tommy.  There you go.

Harold is still a good friend but who do I want to hold and kiss and talk with? Tommy.  There you go.

Tommy is so angry right now and I pray that he will be calmer and ok and pray more and hear God more.  I listend to a lot of songs today to keep me happy but this morning when I talked to Nick I was crying.  Thank God Nick is understanding.

I'm awake at 2 am right now, don't want to study until tommorrow morning and rather stay up and do random stuff online to make myself a bit more distracted so I don't over think about Tommy.  I already pray and think about him enough.