Dear God

Dear God,

It's been a while since I have written you a letter or gotten down on my knees to really pray and have a heart to heart talk.  I have prayed but just in spurts of desperation.

When I really stop and think about what happened the past few days, I just want to cry.  I just want to quit school and take a break from life.

Golda is doing better now but it was so hard and intense the past few days.  You know what happened.  I rather not say it out in case my blog readers get shocked.  Plus, it's private.  But you know God what we had to go through.  I just pray it gets better from here.  I pray my emotional effort and words were not in vain.

God I want to run to You and cry and hug you.  Please hold on to me.  I am starting to cry right now... I guess it's good to let it out.  I am going to see my counselor again in two mondays.  I think she can help me.  I also need to see the academic advisor I think, whether I should finish school earlier rather than later.  Take less courses or something.  I really can't concentrate in school right now, the more classes go by the more distracted, sleepy, and restless I get.

Is it really time for me to stop school and take a break?  I really feel like I emotionally need it but maybe I should press on?  I don't know Lord.  Please comfort me.

So much stuff I still have to do, two big assignments, one little one.  Ministry stuff, outreach stuff...

Seriously, the only thing going right in my life right now is ministry.  Thanks God that at least that part of life didn't crash.  Financially I am drained too.  Please get me the OSAP free money soon.  Please get me the ODSP soon too.  I really need more money.  Running out.

God thanks for listening to me.  Please protect me, my family, and my friends.  Thank you for being my God and being so loving towards me.  God you are good.  I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.  You give me strength to go on.  Keep me from harm, Lord,  give me joy and perseverance.  Lord you are great, I can't stop praising you.  thank you.

In Jesus name I pray,
Amen.