Martine, avoid online dating.

Here I am at Aaron's house, tired out. I only slept less than 3 hours last night (i think, i lost track), and it wasn't very restful sleep, I just kept on waking up several times...

I stayed up till 4am going online and doing stupid stuff while trying to entertain myself. What happened was I drank too much coffee and it was keeping me up and anxious. Also, the anxiousness was driving me nuts so I finally decided to get out and go online. Turns out someone from Christiancafe.com messaged me (yes i had signed up for that Christian dating site just to see what turns up, maybe i am desperate, i dont know) and this guy named Nate had messaged me.

Stupidly or curiously, because he had asked me to text him, I decided to text him. We texted for a while and I found out he is apparently 28 years old, divorced, has a baby, and lives in Kitchener. What a load of trouble I got myself into.

But thank God after a while of texting I told him I was not ready and he said he would stop bothering me. So that's good.

But thats not the end of it. While I was online, I also browsed around on christiancafe.com and decided to contact some guys. I dont know if they will reply but now that I look back I think I am setting myself up for trouble, even if they are really christian and really are all the things they say they are. Sigh.

I really need to get that Jesus engagement ring to remind myself with a physical symbol that I am God's bride and I dont need to be so desperate to fill that hole that Andrew left in my heart.