So please donate here: https://secure.
And if you wanna meet up sometime, let me know, we can give Christmas presence instead of Christmas presents :D Love you all, now I'm gonna go disappear and do some major studying!!!
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Christmas/Sunday school/charity work is on my mind... instead of studying!
Yeah, I know I need to study badly, but for some reason this year I feel like there are so many more exciting things to think about. So before I go now to study, I just wanna say that if any of you haven't thought of a Christmas gift for me, and you wanted to give a gift (no obligations pplz!!!), I really don't need anything... although I have one wish, and that is to rescue child soldiers...
So please donate here: https://secure.invisiblechildren.com/donate/detail_tri.php ONLY 12 dollars!!!
And if you wanna meet up sometime, let me know, we can give Christmas presence instead of Christmas presents :D Love you all, now I'm gonna go disappear and do some major studying!!!
So please donate here: https://secure.
And if you wanna meet up sometime, let me know, we can give Christmas presence instead of Christmas presents :D Love you all, now I'm gonna go disappear and do some major studying!!!
Friday, December 4, 2009
Sometimes I'm not that angelic
Sometimes, I fall into the same sin again and again. I want to be clean, and be ready as a faithful servant on the day I meet Jesus in heaven (and that could be anytime, given accidents or Jesus coming back at any time), but if you look at my life right now, I am not ready. I have a lot of filth still on me from digging up from the grave my old sins. It's terrible. And I tell God that I'm sorry and I will not do it again, but a lot of times, I am clean for a while then I selfishly fall back into it. So I'm gonna put some Bible verses here to remind me, and set some goals...
Galatians 6:9
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
-----
Psalm 51
according to your unfailing love;
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
---
Galatians 5:6b-14
The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love. 7You were running a good race. Who cut in on you and kept you from obeying the truth? 8That kind of persuasion does not come from the one who calls you. 9"A little yeast works through the whole batch of dough." 10I am confident in the Lord that you will take no other view. The one who is throwing you into confusion will pay the penalty, whoever he may be.
13You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love. 14The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself."
--
Ephesians 4
I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received.
You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.
---
---
Matthew 5
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled.
Blessed are the pure in heart,
for they will see God.
13"You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men.
--
--
This is a music video for a song I performed with my Christian band, the Martinis. I felt like that girl, in some ways, before, in the video. And maybe you might have felt that way, I don't know, but the important thing is that we are all struggling and we gotta reach out to each other. Cuz God sees the pain, but do we see the pain and be God's light to others?
--
I know this post is long, but I just received a reassurance from God that I am clean. I just need to spend more time with Him... (got this from an email devo this morning)
John 15:1-5
I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit, He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it so that it may bear more fruit. You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken to you. Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing.
Galatians 6:9
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
-----
Psalm 51
For the director of music. A psalm of David. When the prophet Nathan came to him after David had committed adultery with Bathsheba.
1 Have mercy on me, O God,according to your unfailing love;
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
2 Wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin.
3 For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is always before me.
4 Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight,
so that you are proved right when you speak
and justified when you judge.
5 Surely I was sinful at birth,
sinful from the time my mother conceived me.
6 Surely you desire truth in the inner parts ;
you teach me wisdom in the inmost place.
7 Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean;
wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
8 Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones you have crushed rejoice.
9 Hide your face from my sins
and blot out all my iniquity.
10 Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
11 Do not cast me from your presence
or take your Holy Spirit from me.
12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.
13 Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
and sinners will turn back to you.
---
Galatians 5:6b-14
The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love. 7You were running a good race. Who cut in on you and kept you from obeying the truth? 8That kind of persuasion does not come from the one who calls you. 9"A little yeast works through the whole batch of dough." 10I am confident in the Lord that you will take no other view. The one who is throwing you into confusion will pay the penalty, whoever he may be.
13You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love. 14The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself."
--
Ephesians 4
I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received.
You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.
---
1 Thessalonians 4:7-8
7For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. 8Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you his Holy Spirit.---
Matthew 5
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled.
Blessed are the pure in heart,
for they will see God.
13"You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men.
14"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. 15Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. 16In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.
-------
--
This is a music video for a song I performed with my Christian band, the Martinis. I felt like that girl, in some ways, before, in the video. And maybe you might have felt that way, I don't know, but the important thing is that we are all struggling and we gotta reach out to each other. Cuz God sees the pain, but do we see the pain and be God's light to others?
--
I know this post is long, but I just received a reassurance from God that I am clean. I just need to spend more time with Him... (got this from an email devo this morning)
John 15:1-5
I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit, He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it so that it may bear more fruit. You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken to you. Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Finally, one evening to relax!
I finally finished all my assignments. I'm relaxing now, just spending time with my boo and listening to music online. I gotta start studying tomorrow for final exams, but I had to rest tonight and skip my WA meeting so that I could feel better... I was feeling faint earlier, because I apparently didn't eat enough. Anyway, here's a nice video... (the sound comes a little while into it)...
Oh, yesterday I smashed myself into a pillar... Dangit, was working too hard. Thank God my glasses are not broken and I just got a little bit of sore lip.
Oh, yesterday I smashed myself into a pillar... Dangit, was working too hard. Thank God my glasses are not broken and I just got a little bit of sore lip.
Monday, November 30, 2009
Why do I cause so much trouble for myself????
:-( Sometimes I wish that I never posted some stuff on my blog. I like to update people on my life, express my feelings, and stuff, but sometimes it just ends up coming back to slap me in the face. I am talking about when I mention things in my life at home.
Let me clear some things up:
My mom is hardworking, beautiful, cooks for us a lot, and sometimes humourous. But when I write on my blog, it is often because I am having some fights with her or something, so people might make a judgment and say this or that. I can understand, because yeah, I don't praise her enough. At the same time, life at home can be very hard, and I am not going to censor any feelings that I have just for the sake of people's reputation. I think that you as the reader should be wise when you read my blog, to remember that this is only one perspective and that no one should judge anyone on the basis of what one said. You need to get to know the person before you make judgments. I learned that the hard way.
I am not saying this because I am angry. I am saying this because I feel like telling you just so that people don't judge my mom based on my issues. My mom has done a lot for me, but we just have different worldviews and life values. We have a different culture, as psychologists would say. She is more leaning on the collectivistic, authoritarian viewpoint, and I am more leaning on the individualistic/with some collectivistic, authoritative viewpoint. She comes from a traditional Chinese background and values protection of female offspring and making sure the family image (including herself) is nice and respectable. I come from a very liberal Canadian Chinese background, and values freedom of expression (I don't care if the whole world knows my problems).
The problem is with freedom of expression is that sometimes when you share about your personal life, other people's lives are intertwined and you sometimes have to censor stuff just for the sake of someone else's dignity. And so I think from now on I will try to be a bit more conservative in my freedom of expression when I talk about my family. Otherwise, it will hit me back in the face again.
One day when I become a pastor I guess I will have to censor my family issues in some way too, except to trusted people. I won't be blasting off blog posts like I am now. I am not saying that a pastor should hide their problems. I will show you all my problems if you want, just don't ask about my family cuz my family will be hurt by that.
Another thing I have to clear up:
My bipolar disorder is not caused by my family. Same with anxiety disorder. I got anxiety disorder from a combination of other crap. HAHA I am being secretive. But ultimately, God used my anxiety disorder as a way to understand others better and help them. The bipolar disorder I am not sure why I have it, but I guess I was just born with it and stress just made it worse. But I am sure that with this new medication I am taking, I will be just fine and I will be normal again... or so I think.
I have been sleeping less than usual, although I do feel rested. I am just worried that I will end up not sleeping one day, and get mania again. But right now I am not sleeping as much because I feel fine and not sleepy, not because of mania. I am sure of that. Anyway, I am fine. I just need to make sure I read before bed, because if I don't I will not be sleepy.
Hope this clears up any misunderstanding. I am gonna delete certain stuff off my blog now (sorry).
Let me clear some things up:
My mom is hardworking, beautiful, cooks for us a lot, and sometimes humourous. But when I write on my blog, it is often because I am having some fights with her or something, so people might make a judgment and say this or that. I can understand, because yeah, I don't praise her enough. At the same time, life at home can be very hard, and I am not going to censor any feelings that I have just for the sake of people's reputation. I think that you as the reader should be wise when you read my blog, to remember that this is only one perspective and that no one should judge anyone on the basis of what one said. You need to get to know the person before you make judgments. I learned that the hard way.
I am not saying this because I am angry. I am saying this because I feel like telling you just so that people don't judge my mom based on my issues. My mom has done a lot for me, but we just have different worldviews and life values. We have a different culture, as psychologists would say. She is more leaning on the collectivistic, authoritarian viewpoint, and I am more leaning on the individualistic/with some collectivistic, authoritative viewpoint. She comes from a traditional Chinese background and values protection of female offspring and making sure the family image (including herself) is nice and respectable. I come from a very liberal Canadian Chinese background, and values freedom of expression (I don't care if the whole world knows my problems).
The problem is with freedom of expression is that sometimes when you share about your personal life, other people's lives are intertwined and you sometimes have to censor stuff just for the sake of someone else's dignity. And so I think from now on I will try to be a bit more conservative in my freedom of expression when I talk about my family. Otherwise, it will hit me back in the face again.
One day when I become a pastor I guess I will have to censor my family issues in some way too, except to trusted people. I won't be blasting off blog posts like I am now. I am not saying that a pastor should hide their problems. I will show you all my problems if you want, just don't ask about my family cuz my family will be hurt by that.
Another thing I have to clear up:
My bipolar disorder is not caused by my family. Same with anxiety disorder. I got anxiety disorder from a combination of other crap. HAHA I am being secretive. But ultimately, God used my anxiety disorder as a way to understand others better and help them. The bipolar disorder I am not sure why I have it, but I guess I was just born with it and stress just made it worse. But I am sure that with this new medication I am taking, I will be just fine and I will be normal again... or so I think.
I have been sleeping less than usual, although I do feel rested. I am just worried that I will end up not sleeping one day, and get mania again. But right now I am not sleeping as much because I feel fine and not sleepy, not because of mania. I am sure of that. Anyway, I am fine. I just need to make sure I read before bed, because if I don't I will not be sleepy.
Hope this clears up any misunderstanding. I am gonna delete certain stuff off my blog now (sorry).
Sunday, November 29, 2009
My Christmas Prayer (and Nick Jonas' as well, I think)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jm99HZVpj_E
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_7zRtLptyc4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_7zRtLptyc4
Saturday, November 28, 2009
I'll be home for Christmas (lyrics)
I'm dreamin' tonight of a place I love
Even more then I usually do
And although I know it's a long road back
I promise you
I'll be home for Christmas
You can count on me
Please have snow and mistletoe
And presents under the tree
Christmas Eve will find me
Where the love light beams
I'll be home for Christmas
---
After some talks and some prayer time, I have decided not to move out till I get married. And after inviting my family out to a Family Appreciation Dinner last Saturday, things are a lot better. Me and my sis worked out the problems and me and my mom are chatting well together. We ate lobster at "Best Friends Restaurant", it was quite cheap and I love the restaurant name. You get 2 small lobsters for 12.99 if you buy 25 dollars worth of other main dishes before tax.
Anyway, I went Chrristmas shopping yesterday (almost said "Christian shopping" and actually it is quite Christian, the shopping I did) and finished everything in one day. :D I am so proud of myself! Most of the stuff I ordered online (stuff where you donate to charity and they give u a free card in honour of your friend), and also a bunch of stuff from Scarborough Town Centre. I say it is Christian shopping because I am not wasting stuff, not buying useless gifts, only things that are worth it.
The funny thing is that I originally budgeted 75 dollars for Christmas gifts, but now I'm at maybe 200 dollars... :P or at least 150.
But I am very proud of myself! :D I bought Jesus Manga, and now Adrian has a new study Bible! And some other fun stuff for him and other people!
I look at it this way... I still have a lot of money left over from this year, cuz I got 3 scholarships (I expected only one) but yeah! :D
Even more then I usually do
And although I know it's a long road back
I promise you
I'll be home for Christmas
You can count on me
Please have snow and mistletoe
And presents under the tree
Christmas Eve will find me
Where the love light beams
I'll be home for Christmas
---
After some talks and some prayer time, I have decided not to move out till I get married. And after inviting my family out to a Family Appreciation Dinner last Saturday, things are a lot better. Me and my sis worked out the problems and me and my mom are chatting well together. We ate lobster at "Best Friends Restaurant", it was quite cheap and I love the restaurant name. You get 2 small lobsters for 12.99 if you buy 25 dollars worth of other main dishes before tax.
Anyway, I went Chrristmas shopping yesterday (almost said "Christian shopping" and actually it is quite Christian, the shopping I did) and finished everything in one day. :D I am so proud of myself! Most of the stuff I ordered online (stuff where you donate to charity and they give u a free card in honour of your friend), and also a bunch of stuff from Scarborough Town Centre. I say it is Christian shopping because I am not wasting stuff, not buying useless gifts, only things that are worth it.
The funny thing is that I originally budgeted 75 dollars for Christmas gifts, but now I'm at maybe 200 dollars... :P or at least 150.
But I am very proud of myself! :D I bought Jesus Manga, and now Adrian has a new study Bible! And some other fun stuff for him and other people!
I look at it this way... I still have a lot of money left over from this year, cuz I got 3 scholarships (I expected only one) but yeah! :D
Friday, November 27, 2009
Best website ever to stop child labour!
This website gives you ratings for stores and companies, to let you know which are good (don't use child labour) and which are bad (they use a lot of child labour). I noticed that GAP is generally pretty good, and Walmart and Sketchers are really bad... anyways check it out!
http://www.free2work.org/home
http://www.free2work.org/home
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