Yesterday was Sam's birthday. I didn't realize it until today, when I went on his facebook page. Of course I wrote "Happy Belated Birthday" but I felt really bad for forgetting his birthday. Truth is, I knew his birthday was Feb. 1st, but for some reason yesterday it just didn't click in that it was Feb. 1st, Sam's birthday.
I was probably too preoccupied with all the stuff I had to do and also this newfound guy named Andrew. So I right now I feel bad that I didn't remember Sam's birthday, esp. since this was a guy I supposedly had a deep connection with in past months.
Am I just a superficial person? Jumping from guy to guy? After one guy has "expired" I just jump onto a new one? Am I using guys just so that I have something to dream about, something to hold on to? Am I wasting my time??
Part of me really wished Sam and I could have worked out. Right now, this Andrew guy isn't even that interested in me as far as I know. And sometimes I still think of Adrian, even yesterday when I bought something from Taco Bell (he loves tacos). I guess I still have a lot to figure out.
Everyone longs for intimacy. But sometimes it's better to seek an appropriate type of intimacy amongst friends, esp. when you are not ready for a relationship. I know I am not ready. I'm still not over Adrian, that's the truth. I might be over Sam though, and this Andrew thing is definitely wasting a lot of my time.
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Hallo. Indeed, people were made for intimacy. It's a whole lot better when we're close to Christ because then we have a better understanding of who we are and then who we are to be to others. When we're not sure who we are, we look for stability in something/someone else. Attachments run deep...run from them! (jk...sorta).
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